Nice Couples Do: How to Turn Your Secret Dreams into by Joan Elizabeth Lloyd

By Joan Elizabeth Lloyd

Jam-packed with erotic tales and video games, this assortment deals genuine recommendation to attracted to spicing up their love lifestyles. Lloyd bargains particular, step by step directions approximately getting over the embarrassment of making an attempt whatever new, stirring up curiosity, and the thrill (and occasional pitfalls) of inventive intercourse.

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It’s very nice to have a cuddle. (Steve, 47, divorced, IT) I think it’s probably more about being single and the traits of my personality. I mean I’m naturally shy, was as a child. I continued into my teenage years and I guess I have the typical things like poor self-image, that sort of thing. And it seemed the only alternative. (Ron, 51, divorced, teacher) Findings I describe elsewhere (Sanders 2007c) note how men living with impairments are a specific group of clients that visit sex workers because of the disabling effects of the modern social world that prevent engagement in everyday social and leisure events where relationships 40 Client conduct: motivations, markets and morality are sparked.

He admitted that some of the questions were challenging and had raised guilt about his secrecy which had ‘hit a raw nerve’. He wanted to be interviewed again – but after going through all the questions he accepted that this would not be helpful for the research. (Extract from fieldwork diary, August 2005) Many men found engaging with research about the sex industry, although equally daunting and nerve-racking, a cathartic process. Although the interviews were not designed to be ‘therapeutic’, it was clear (and expected) that the interviews would appeal to men who wanted to talk about their purchasing sex and their private intimate lives and selves.

It was clear that when interviews were conducted in my office, my status as an employee of a public institution and as a formal researcher reduced opportunities for my role to be sexualized or for any ambiguities about my intentions to emerge. I can say this because I did not experience some of the overt sexual comments or attempts to objectify my role that some researchers of male clients have disclosed when they advertised for clients in less official or substantiated environments. For instance, when Peng (2007: 317), researching as an undergraduate student, asked for interviewees for a study on men’s motivations to buy sex through an Internet bulletin board, she was met with sexual remarks, personal and inappropriate questions and solicitation such as ‘Let’s go to a motel and I will tell you every detail’.

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